Loving, trusting, believing – it’s all easy when the sky is covered in blue. It’s natural when the birds are singing a song that fills your heart with joy. Faith comes ever gently as the flowers bloom with the promise of new life and the trees provide shade with their abundant expanse of leaves.
It’s harder when the clouds fill your days and the storms of life seem to overtake you. The struggle comes with the heartache, the agony, the grief of losing someone you love with every part of your being. Darkness comes and it can drain you of the energy to see the Light. You know He is there, yet… The pain.
Drawing on your faith seems like a natural thing for a believer, but when you are in the darkest place of your life – well, it is harder. I am thankful for this:
fear not, for I am with you; be not dismayed, for I am your God; I will strengthen you, I will help you, I will uphold you with my righteous right hand. – Isaiah 41:10
I am reminded that He is holding onto me, even when my strength is gone, when I. Can’t .Hold. On.
What a beautiful promise!
He is ever faithful – even in my weakness. He has me – even when I falter. He is my Light – even when I feel like I’m surrounded by the darkness of circumstances. He is my ever-present help in trouble.
Feeling desperate, alone, broken … It does not mean you lack faith. It means you are human. Grieving doesn’t mean you have given up hope – the HOPE is the only thing allowing you to take the next breath. Jesus is our hope. Jesus grieved when Lazarus died. He wept.
Grief is ever-changing. No one can tell you that you are grieving wrong, too long, too hard, not enough, too much. We all grieve differently. That’s okay.
I’ve come to really appreciate the days where music fills my heart. I am thankful for every smile, laugh, and every speck of joy that I have and that my family has. I also feel the hurts, the disappointments, and sadness more intensely. Broken relationships break my heart. We have a short time with our loved ones, to see people turn away from/ push away people who love them/ they love – causes deep wounds in my soul.
Sorrow has become my companion. But God…
He fills me with hope for the future He has planned for me (and my loved ones). He reminds me that He will never leave me or forsake me. He reminds me that HE is in control. I must lay this pain at the foot of the Cross – leave my burdens with Him. I can’t carry this burden of grief and loss – but He can and will, if I will just trust and obey.
The sky will not always be blue – there will be clouds. The storms of life will come – His light will shine through. Sadness will come, but joy comes in the morning. Tears will fall and He will collect them in a bottle. The weight of this world will be, at times, overwhelming, but it can’t compare to the weight of Glory. Heartbreak will come; He will hide you in the shadow of His wings.
I like that! He will hide me in the shadow of His wings. I have needed hiding, holding, rest, and solace. I am thankful that I can find refuge in Him.
Speaking of wings… My instincts, desires, dreams, wishes, prayers – have been to run, to escape. I know I can’t escape the pain, but there is a flight or fight thing going on inside me. Many times the flight wins…although only in my heart.
And I say, “Oh, that I had wings like a dove! I would fly away and be at rest; – Psalm 55:6
What an amazing father we have! He loves us, cares for us, protects us (even from ourselves).
We are His children, so He also corrects and chastises us. He has done that over and over for me… Because he loves me.
I love Him.
What about you? Are you in a dark filled time? Are the clouds blocking your joy? Can you see His light there? Is there grief that is consuming your nights and days? Do you need rest and peace? Are you exhausted from the brokenness of this world?
Oh, taste and see that the LORD is good! Blessed is the man who takes refuge in him! – Psalm 34:8
Take refuge in The One who can help you! The One who can save you!
If you don’t know Jesus Christ as your Lord and Savior, talk to a pastor, or Christian friend. Contact me if you need to. This is the most important thing you will ever do. Your eternity depends on it.
If you are grieving and need someone to talk to…contact me (I’m not a counselor) or look for a Compassionate Friends group in your area. Find someone to talk with. You are not alone!
You have kept count of my tossings; put my tears in your bottle. Are they not in your book? – Psalm 56:8
So we do not lose heart. Though our outer self is wasting away, our inner self is being renewed day by day. For this light momentary affliction is preparing for us an eternal weight of glory beyond all comparison, – 2 Corinthians 4:16-17